DUPLICIA
By: Syaimma Syed Ali
The red was beautiful as it trickled down my hand. It glimmered under the lone light that shined from above me. I couldn’t help but breathe in the sweet smell of iron that drifted in the air as I gently caressed his cheek while he laid beneath me. My fingers trailed down from his cheek to his neck, then to his chest. He had soft skin. I liked that about him. I liked many things about him. How often he made me cackle in glee. How selfish and arrogant he was. How utterly ruthless he was.
His body still felt warm on my thighs while I straddled him. His warmth felt nice, but I preferred the chill that was soon to come.
It was a shame that he had to go. If only he had behaved, then I could’ve spared him.
But he hadn’t.
He laid a hand on her, my most prized possession. He hurt her, even after I explicitly warned him against it. I decided to wrap my hands around his neck and allow his soul to leave him at my command. It was a wonderful thing, being born a woman. Seducing and manipulating men was the easiest thing in the book.
It was intoxicating, exhilarating even, to feel his life slowly leaving his body. Of course, where was the fun in making things quick and easy? I let him float on the borders of life and death as I twirled and tossed his insides out of his disgusting flesh. He groaned and gasped, but all he could do was watch until his pitifully beating heart stopped its rhythm and his eyes lost its light.
It was over faster than I intended, but I was satisfied. He was dead, and he could hurt my prized possession no more from where he was headed. She would thank me. No, she would thank a person whose identity she didn’t even know. I didn’t mind. Rather, I would love for her to never know of my true self. Until the time came, of course. Until then, she must not know. She must never be aware.
And I couldn’t wait for that moment to come.
With a sharp breath, my eyes jolted open. A white light masked my vision momentarily before my eyes focused on the chandelier hanging from the ceiling. I found myself breathing heavily, sitting on the couch in my living room. Confusion engulfed me as I tried hard to recall the events that led me to where I was, the last I could remember being the visit to my ex-boyfriend’s apartment after our unfortunate breakup. I shook the thought away. This was not the first time I had forgotten fragments of my memory.
I was used to it.
My stomach growled loudly, snapping me out of my thoughts. I peered out the window to notice the brightly shining moon in the dark sky. Was my last meal this morning? Had I eaten something after visiting Derek? I dragged my feet to the kitchen and a sharp pain struck my right shoulder. I furrowed my eyebrows, wondering if I had slept the wrong position or carried something heavy.
Ignoring the many thoughts that spin in my head, I opened the refrigerator and took out some leftovers from last night. As I was about to wash a plate, a strong stench reeking from the kitchen sink slapped me across the face. It smelled similar to metal, and to call it pungent was too tame a word. As I turned on the tap to let the water flush it out, I noticed faint red stains on my blouse. What could have possibly happened before this?
I lost my appetite - courtesy of the smell - and I decided to simply freshen up before heading to bed. Stepping into the shower, I closed my eyes and let the warm water trickle down my skin. Soothing into the warmth of the water, my eyes fluttered closed and I allowed my mind to calm as it slowly turned blank.
Suddenly, a sickening image of Derek flashed violently in my head. His throat was blueish black, blood gushing out of his exposed body as it seeped through the floor of his apartment, devilish laughter echoing in the background.
My eyes widened in horror and I threw my body to the wall of my shower. What on earth was that?
My hands started to shake and tears streamed uncontrollably down my cheek. I fell to my knees and curled my body, hugging myself as I cried, hoping the sudden fear that attacked me would fade away. I could feel my heart pound rapidly in the confinements of my chest as my body trembled violently under the warm shower. I couldn’t breathe. My head started to spin and for a moment, I thought I was going to die. After what seemed to be an eternity, my body calmed itself and I could finally feel oxygen entering my lungs. It was only when I deemed things perfectly calm I staggered to my feet and took the deepest breath I could. I turned off the water and scrambled out of the shower, jumping straight into bed.
Vague thoughts started spinning in my head, and I wanted to throw up at them all. It was as if they were hinting something that I had forgotten. Something that got lost in the moments of my life in which I just couldn't recall. My body was overwhelmed with fatigue, both mentally and physically, as though all the living life had been sucked right out of me. I couldn’t think anymore. I closed my eyes and felt my body embrace the darkness as I drifted into a deep, deep slumber.
The sun had risen earlier than I hoped for the next morning. I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling, remembering the panic attacks my body had gone through the previous night. Perhaps I should invest some time for a morning run.
As I rolled in bed, reluctant to rise, the memory of a loud argument flickered in my mind. I could recall myself yelling at Derek, the clothes I had worn then were the ones I had worn yesterday. The atmosphere was tense as we yelled at each other, unforgiving flames burning in our eyes. I tried to recount what had happened next.
Nothing.
As I forced myself up, I considered calling Derek up to check up on him, to see if we had resolved the problem and maybe hope for him to refresh my memory.
I picked up the phone from its charging port and dialled his number. A puzzled eyebrow was raised when I noticed my call log indicating that I had actually called him multiple times yesterday. That’s funny, I don’t remember calling him at all. The dial tone kept ringing but Derek did not pick up his phone. An unpleasant feeling welled up in the pit of my stomach and I felt like throwing up again.
Something definitely wasn’t right.
I dialled his number a few more times, persistent and stubborn, before eventually giving up and rushing over to his apartment to check on him. Stepping into the washroom, I could feel my head spin again as my mind recalled the stench of blood in my sink, my stained blouse and the nightmare of Derek. The mere fact he wasn’t answering his phone in itself was worrisome, and I could only hope that he was just sleeping. The sickness in my stomach suddenly felt worse, as if telling me that something was gravely wrong.
As I rinsed my face and raised my gaze to the mirror, I noticed that there was something different about my reflection staring back at me.
That wasn’t me.
That was a stranger.
Oh, don’t be silly, I thought to myself, who are you kidding? That’s not possible! I took a second look at the reflection, just to be sure, when I noticed the lips - my normally perfectly pinkish lips - curl into a smile. A dark, malicious smile.
That was a bad thing to see.
“Good morning,” she spoke. The reflection spoke to me. “I hope you had a good rest last night.”
I screamed at the sultry voice from the reflection that echoed throughout the washroom. My body jolted and slammed my back against the wall of the bathroom. My legs threatening to make a run but somehow my entire body was frozen when the voice called out to me, requesting me to stay and to not be afraid.
“Wh-who-” My voice croaked as I tried to speak. “-who are you?”
“I am you,” she chuckled. “From this side of the mirror.”
She - my reflection - licked her lips in glee and seemed to lean closer towards the mirror. Although she was smiling, her eyes, the ones I knew so well but couldn’t call mine, merely reflected a void that sent a shiver down my spine. They were void of all emotion, there was nothing behind those windows of her person. I didn’t know this, know her, at all. How can my own reflection feel so foreign?
“Did you like my gift, by the way?” she asked with yet another questionable smile. “I hope you did. I harvested them especially for you after all.”
I could only blink. This shouldn’t be happening. What could one possible say to her reflection? “Wha… what do you mean?” I tried, confusion lacing my voice.
She only hummed and allowed her smile to widen before she spoke again, her sultry voice (which was not at all mine) sending yet another chill down my spine.
“I guess you haven’t checked the fridge, my darling! How sad, I wanted to see you surprised. No worries. I’ll just tell you.”
Her eyes narrowed as the corner of her lips curved closer to them. Her smile as sinister as ever, her eyes darkened and she giggled with excitement to tell me of her gift. She may have looked like me, but that was not me.
“Remember that naughty, naughty boy Derek?” She chuckled. “Well, I decided to help you take care of him. I got rid of that little pest for you!”
Suddenly, the sickness in my stomach welled up to my throat as my heart pounded rapidly in my chest.
“T-take care…?”
“Go see for yourself, my dear.”
My legs took off and ran to the kitchen, my hands were trembling as I opened the door to my refrigerator slowly.
I should have stopped just as my fingers reached the handle.
Continuous screams and shrieks poured out of my lips once my eyes set themselves upon the jars that were arranged neatly in the refrigerator. Each jar had a different content, a reddish liquid letting them float comfortably. Kidneys, spleen, intestines, heart, lungs, stomach and a head.
Derek’s head.
His eyeballs rolled upwards as his mouth spread open, his tongue jutted out.
I fell to the floor, my stomach threatening to puke all its contents out. My head started spinning really badly. I was speechless. It was only hours ago Derek was living his best life, but now, because of this monster, he was gone forever.
“You k-k-killed him!” I screeched.
I mustered just enough strength to drag my feet towards the mirror once again, tears streaming down my cheeks. My reflection chuckled and nodded, seemingly proud of what she did.
“He got what he deserved.” She purred. “He shouldn’t have laid a hand on you.”
“You killed him!!! You’re a monster!”
I slammed my fists on the sides of the mirror, repeating my claims as I continued to bash my fists. I wasn’t sure what I was doing, but I thought that whatever damage the mirror took, my reflection would take it too. And perhaps, she would go away like that.
However, the smile and proudness she had disappeared as I continued to yell at her, curse her for killing Derek. Her eyes became ice cold and her lips contorted into an angry frown. Suddenly, she too slammed her fist onto the surface of the mirror. The other side of the mirror.
“Excuse me?” she hissed, like she had the nerve to be offended at something as obscene as this. “This is the thanks I get? After all I did for you!”
“I never asked you to do that!” I bailed, and cried, and screamed, making absolutely no effort to disguise my horror, my disgust. “You… y-you murderer! You are not me! You had no right to do that!”
How ridiculous it seemed, me screaming at my own reflection.
But that wasn’t me.
That was a murderer. A monster. A demon.
I could never be that person.
A scoff escaped the lips of my reflection, “Such an ungrateful child.”
Suddenly, my hands were wrapped around my throat. My reflection glared at me as she kept repeating the words ‘ungrateful’. Her grip on my throat tightened and no matter how much I struggled, her grip wouldn’t loosen. After a final helpless cry left my lips, everything started to turn black.
Derek’s fateful murder was broadcasted all over the news, reporter after reporter calling it brutal and sadistic. I’d rather call it artistic and sentimental. They never mentioned his name, however, merely calling him a body.
He was a person. He was once her person.
And now all he was was a body.
I stirred the spoon in the cup of coffee I held in my hands, waiting for it to cool before taking a sip. I wouldn’t mind hot beverages but her tongue could never handle such heat. It was a shame that my dearest could no longer inhabit this body with me. I enjoyed our time together - my knowing and her blissful ignorance.
Unfortunately, she was such an ungrateful child that I had to put her to sleep.
I placed my cup down onto the coffee table when I heard a knock on the door, smiling as I head towards the door. Must be the police. I should remember to cry once I hear about ‘my boyfriend’s’ death.
His body still felt warm on my thighs while I straddled him. His warmth felt nice, but I preferred the chill that was soon to come.
It was a shame that he had to go. If only he had behaved, then I could’ve spared him.
But he hadn’t.
He laid a hand on her, my most prized possession. He hurt her, even after I explicitly warned him against it. I decided to wrap my hands around his neck and allow his soul to leave him at my command. It was a wonderful thing, being born a woman. Seducing and manipulating men was the easiest thing in the book.
It was intoxicating, exhilarating even, to feel his life slowly leaving his body. Of course, where was the fun in making things quick and easy? I let him float on the borders of life and death as I twirled and tossed his insides out of his disgusting flesh. He groaned and gasped, but all he could do was watch until his pitifully beating heart stopped its rhythm and his eyes lost its light.
It was over faster than I intended, but I was satisfied. He was dead, and he could hurt my prized possession no more from where he was headed. She would thank me. No, she would thank a person whose identity she didn’t even know. I didn’t mind. Rather, I would love for her to never know of my true self. Until the time came, of course. Until then, she must not know. She must never be aware.
And I couldn’t wait for that moment to come.
:x:
With a sharp breath, my eyes jolted open. A white light masked my vision momentarily before my eyes focused on the chandelier hanging from the ceiling. I found myself breathing heavily, sitting on the couch in my living room. Confusion engulfed me as I tried hard to recall the events that led me to where I was, the last I could remember being the visit to my ex-boyfriend’s apartment after our unfortunate breakup. I shook the thought away. This was not the first time I had forgotten fragments of my memory.
I was used to it.
My stomach growled loudly, snapping me out of my thoughts. I peered out the window to notice the brightly shining moon in the dark sky. Was my last meal this morning? Had I eaten something after visiting Derek? I dragged my feet to the kitchen and a sharp pain struck my right shoulder. I furrowed my eyebrows, wondering if I had slept the wrong position or carried something heavy.
Ignoring the many thoughts that spin in my head, I opened the refrigerator and took out some leftovers from last night. As I was about to wash a plate, a strong stench reeking from the kitchen sink slapped me across the face. It smelled similar to metal, and to call it pungent was too tame a word. As I turned on the tap to let the water flush it out, I noticed faint red stains on my blouse. What could have possibly happened before this?
I lost my appetite - courtesy of the smell - and I decided to simply freshen up before heading to bed. Stepping into the shower, I closed my eyes and let the warm water trickle down my skin. Soothing into the warmth of the water, my eyes fluttered closed and I allowed my mind to calm as it slowly turned blank.
Suddenly, a sickening image of Derek flashed violently in my head. His throat was blueish black, blood gushing out of his exposed body as it seeped through the floor of his apartment, devilish laughter echoing in the background.
My eyes widened in horror and I threw my body to the wall of my shower. What on earth was that?
My hands started to shake and tears streamed uncontrollably down my cheek. I fell to my knees and curled my body, hugging myself as I cried, hoping the sudden fear that attacked me would fade away. I could feel my heart pound rapidly in the confinements of my chest as my body trembled violently under the warm shower. I couldn’t breathe. My head started to spin and for a moment, I thought I was going to die. After what seemed to be an eternity, my body calmed itself and I could finally feel oxygen entering my lungs. It was only when I deemed things perfectly calm I staggered to my feet and took the deepest breath I could. I turned off the water and scrambled out of the shower, jumping straight into bed.
Vague thoughts started spinning in my head, and I wanted to throw up at them all. It was as if they were hinting something that I had forgotten. Something that got lost in the moments of my life in which I just couldn't recall. My body was overwhelmed with fatigue, both mentally and physically, as though all the living life had been sucked right out of me. I couldn’t think anymore. I closed my eyes and felt my body embrace the darkness as I drifted into a deep, deep slumber.
:x:
The sun had risen earlier than I hoped for the next morning. I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling, remembering the panic attacks my body had gone through the previous night. Perhaps I should invest some time for a morning run.
As I rolled in bed, reluctant to rise, the memory of a loud argument flickered in my mind. I could recall myself yelling at Derek, the clothes I had worn then were the ones I had worn yesterday. The atmosphere was tense as we yelled at each other, unforgiving flames burning in our eyes. I tried to recount what had happened next.
Nothing.
As I forced myself up, I considered calling Derek up to check up on him, to see if we had resolved the problem and maybe hope for him to refresh my memory.
I picked up the phone from its charging port and dialled his number. A puzzled eyebrow was raised when I noticed my call log indicating that I had actually called him multiple times yesterday. That’s funny, I don’t remember calling him at all. The dial tone kept ringing but Derek did not pick up his phone. An unpleasant feeling welled up in the pit of my stomach and I felt like throwing up again.
Something definitely wasn’t right.
I dialled his number a few more times, persistent and stubborn, before eventually giving up and rushing over to his apartment to check on him. Stepping into the washroom, I could feel my head spin again as my mind recalled the stench of blood in my sink, my stained blouse and the nightmare of Derek. The mere fact he wasn’t answering his phone in itself was worrisome, and I could only hope that he was just sleeping. The sickness in my stomach suddenly felt worse, as if telling me that something was gravely wrong.
As I rinsed my face and raised my gaze to the mirror, I noticed that there was something different about my reflection staring back at me.
That wasn’t me.
That was a stranger.
Oh, don’t be silly, I thought to myself, who are you kidding? That’s not possible! I took a second look at the reflection, just to be sure, when I noticed the lips - my normally perfectly pinkish lips - curl into a smile. A dark, malicious smile.
That was a bad thing to see.
“Good morning,” she spoke. The reflection spoke to me. “I hope you had a good rest last night.”
I screamed at the sultry voice from the reflection that echoed throughout the washroom. My body jolted and slammed my back against the wall of the bathroom. My legs threatening to make a run but somehow my entire body was frozen when the voice called out to me, requesting me to stay and to not be afraid.
“Wh-who-” My voice croaked as I tried to speak. “-who are you?”
“I am you,” she chuckled. “From this side of the mirror.”
She - my reflection - licked her lips in glee and seemed to lean closer towards the mirror. Although she was smiling, her eyes, the ones I knew so well but couldn’t call mine, merely reflected a void that sent a shiver down my spine. They were void of all emotion, there was nothing behind those windows of her person. I didn’t know this, know her, at all. How can my own reflection feel so foreign?
“Did you like my gift, by the way?” she asked with yet another questionable smile. “I hope you did. I harvested them especially for you after all.”
I could only blink. This shouldn’t be happening. What could one possible say to her reflection? “Wha… what do you mean?” I tried, confusion lacing my voice.
She only hummed and allowed her smile to widen before she spoke again, her sultry voice (which was not at all mine) sending yet another chill down my spine.
“I guess you haven’t checked the fridge, my darling! How sad, I wanted to see you surprised. No worries. I’ll just tell you.”
Her eyes narrowed as the corner of her lips curved closer to them. Her smile as sinister as ever, her eyes darkened and she giggled with excitement to tell me of her gift. She may have looked like me, but that was not me.
“Remember that naughty, naughty boy Derek?” She chuckled. “Well, I decided to help you take care of him. I got rid of that little pest for you!”
Suddenly, the sickness in my stomach welled up to my throat as my heart pounded rapidly in my chest.
“T-take care…?”
“Go see for yourself, my dear.”
My legs took off and ran to the kitchen, my hands were trembling as I opened the door to my refrigerator slowly.
I should have stopped just as my fingers reached the handle.
Continuous screams and shrieks poured out of my lips once my eyes set themselves upon the jars that were arranged neatly in the refrigerator. Each jar had a different content, a reddish liquid letting them float comfortably. Kidneys, spleen, intestines, heart, lungs, stomach and a head.
Derek’s head.
His eyeballs rolled upwards as his mouth spread open, his tongue jutted out.
I fell to the floor, my stomach threatening to puke all its contents out. My head started spinning really badly. I was speechless. It was only hours ago Derek was living his best life, but now, because of this monster, he was gone forever.
“You k-k-killed him!” I screeched.
I mustered just enough strength to drag my feet towards the mirror once again, tears streaming down my cheeks. My reflection chuckled and nodded, seemingly proud of what she did.
“He got what he deserved.” She purred. “He shouldn’t have laid a hand on you.”
“You killed him!!! You’re a monster!”
I slammed my fists on the sides of the mirror, repeating my claims as I continued to bash my fists. I wasn’t sure what I was doing, but I thought that whatever damage the mirror took, my reflection would take it too. And perhaps, she would go away like that.
However, the smile and proudness she had disappeared as I continued to yell at her, curse her for killing Derek. Her eyes became ice cold and her lips contorted into an angry frown. Suddenly, she too slammed her fist onto the surface of the mirror. The other side of the mirror.
“Excuse me?” she hissed, like she had the nerve to be offended at something as obscene as this. “This is the thanks I get? After all I did for you!”
“I never asked you to do that!” I bailed, and cried, and screamed, making absolutely no effort to disguise my horror, my disgust. “You… y-you murderer! You are not me! You had no right to do that!”
How ridiculous it seemed, me screaming at my own reflection.
But that wasn’t me.
That was a murderer. A monster. A demon.
I could never be that person.
A scoff escaped the lips of my reflection, “Such an ungrateful child.”
Suddenly, my hands were wrapped around my throat. My reflection glared at me as she kept repeating the words ‘ungrateful’. Her grip on my throat tightened and no matter how much I struggled, her grip wouldn’t loosen. After a final helpless cry left my lips, everything started to turn black.
:x:
Derek’s fateful murder was broadcasted all over the news, reporter after reporter calling it brutal and sadistic. I’d rather call it artistic and sentimental. They never mentioned his name, however, merely calling him a body.
He was a person. He was once her person.
And now all he was was a body.
I stirred the spoon in the cup of coffee I held in my hands, waiting for it to cool before taking a sip. I wouldn’t mind hot beverages but her tongue could never handle such heat. It was a shame that my dearest could no longer inhabit this body with me. I enjoyed our time together - my knowing and her blissful ignorance.
Unfortunately, she was such an ungrateful child that I had to put her to sleep.
I placed my cup down onto the coffee table when I heard a knock on the door, smiling as I head towards the door. Must be the police. I should remember to cry once I hear about ‘my boyfriend’s’ death.
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